So after reading Meredith's post about doing homework with NINE children, I feel really dumb even saying this, but...
I HATE homework! I only have one child, but doing homework is like pulling teeth without Novocaine - seriously! Last night I sat down to help E. study for her math test because she was out sick this week and missed two math classes. By the end, I was so bugged I sent her to get PJ's on and go to bed - I couldn't even finish helping her study.
I went upstairs to talk to her after a few minutes, and she was lying in her bed SOBBING! I felt so horrible! We talked about the issue, and I apologized for being impatient with her. I explained that it was frustrating to me to have explained the same concepts so many times and to have her still not understand. She then said (still sobbing), "I'm sorry, Mommy! I don't know why I don't understand".
How sad is that?!?! My daughter had to apologize to me for not understanding math concepts? I felt like the biggest loser! Why do I lack patience - still - after being on this earth almost 40 stinking years?
I love my daughter so much, and my family is my life. We are happy, truly, and we love being with each other. I want to preserve that relationship forever, literally, and I feel so terrible when I lose my patience and when I am less-than-loving with my miracle child.
As Meredith has said, these moments make me think about my Heavenly Father, too. How sad he must be, watching us make the same mistakes over and over, never learning our lessons or learning them so slowly. He doesn't yell at us, or send us to bed without helping us; instead, he kindly, patiently, lovingly keeps teaching us the same lessons over and over.
I want to be like that someday! I want my daughter to feel that mercy and love from me in this life, too, so she can get a glimpse of how her Heavenly Parents feel about her.
Is it possible? I think it is! Like Meagan has said - WE WILL SUCCEED!
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2 comments:
So all I can say is been there, done that. The good news is we don't have to be perfect. The better news is E has already forgiven you! The best news is maybe next week, when I am ready to hurl G out the window because she forgets how to spell cat, I will think of you and hopefully not cause her permanent emotional damage!
And they're still in elementary school! Tonight I had to call R to help B with her science homework...I'm in deep poo poo next year!
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