He hears and answers

In my last post I made mention of a particularly inspiring experience for me. You will recall that I was struggling with the decision to tie my tubes, under the advice of my doctor. But I knew our family was not complete. And so I struggled. One day, late in my pregnancy, I had not felt my baby move all day. By the time Oliver came home from work, I was in a panic. We made our way to the hospital ER. I recall there were hardly any patients there that night. I was admitted, and then a kindly nurse took over my care. She hooked me up to the ultrasound machine, and my worried heart was calmed as I heard the baby's heart beat. I don't recall why, at some point, Oliver stepped out of the room. The nurse serenely asked if we were LDS. I was surprised and answered that we were, and how did she know? She smiled and answered that it was because of my husband's BYU t-shirt. Shoulda known. The man owns works shirts, and BYU tshirts. That's it. Anyhow, I felt this intense calm come over me. She was LDS also. I began to pour out my heart and soul to this woman, a virtual stranger...but not really. She was more like an angel sent to bless my life. I told her my whole story. And then she told me hers. Her story was very similar to mine. Only her ending was different, because she had chosen to go against her doctors advice. She got pregnant again. And became deathly ill. And almost lost the baby. And was on bedrest almost the entire 9 months; while her husband was left to fend for himself and their 4 other children. And then, in quiet tones, she shared with me that while she was not sorry for having another child, she deeply regretted the trials that came upon her family as a result. And in quiet tones, she shared with me the medical reasons why I probably should not have another child. And then, sincerely, told me that truly the decision was between me, Oliver, and Heavenly Father. And that was that. The rest of the evening was uneventful, thankfully. But as I reflect upon that night, I know it was no coincidence. The possibilities of having that particular nurse, with her particular experiences, on that very night....well....we all know that wasn't by chance. I know, even now, that a kind Father in Heaven was answering my pleas, through the voice of another. After my visit with that nurse, I was at peace. She was my answer to prayer. And even though that decision was truly one of the hardest decisions of my life, I am so grateful that I was never alone.

That was then.

Yesterday, we celebrated our son J's 4th birthday. I can't believe our youngest child is 4! He was placed with us just prior to his 2nd birthday. He's now celebrated 3 of his 4 birthdays with us. I still remember the first words he said when he walked into our house the first time. He went straight into the pantry, looked up at all the food and said "I eat!" That was his mantra for his first several months with us. We were amazed at how much his little body could put away.

And so now, I have 10 children, between the ages of 11 and 4. I guess it's time for me to get rid of my post-baby weight. According to Weight Watchers I am 35 lbs over my "target weight". I like to rationalize that with 10 kids, that's really only about 3 lbs overweight for each kid. That's nothing, right? (But shhh.....don't figure out that I only birthed 4, so technically....it's a bit more than that). So yes, one of my New Year's Resolutions is to get rid of that extra pudge around the middle. This is now.

Too bad doing laundry doesn't burn more calories....